Back to School Follies

It's that time of year again in the Northern Hemisphere. Children are preparing to head back to school and parents lives are disrupted.

First there is the mad scramble to get to Barnes & Noble before they close to grab those summer reading books. The same books that you had purchased when you first received the list in June. However, now your little darling is panicking because she hasn't read anything but friends texts and Facebook all summer and she can't find the books.

You breathlessly burst through the green double doors, to hear "Barnes & Noble will be closed in five minutes, please bring your purchases to the front register. Skirting around the guy at the NOOK display you use evasive maneuvers in order to get to the center aisle table that had been stacked to overflowing with the summer reading books. Where are they? Why is the table loaded with Romance books instead of All Quiet on the Western Front and The Chosen?

Your eyes search frantically for someone to help you. Finally you find a young woman putting books on a shelf. "Miss, miss, can you help me?"

She gives you a strange look and stands up. "Mom, a strange lady is talking to me." Visions of police officers  grilling you dance through your head.

Finally someone with a name tag wanders into your area. You ask where the summer reading books are. "All, they sold out. They've been gone for over a month."

Great! Now what?

"All the summer reading is available on NOOK."

What else can you do? The library is closed. There are no other bookstores in the area. If you order them online they will never arrive before school starts.

The guy is walking away from the NOOK counter. You run over to him and stammer out your problem. He is even kind enough to load the summer reading books onto the NOOK for you.

The cashier patiently rang up the ereader and the half dozen romances you had grabbed while you were waiting for the reader to load.

Half an hour after you had first entered the store, they are locking the door behind you.

Mission accomplished.

Tomorrow it's sneaker shopping.